I Sense A Presence X


Sally’s gaze was fixed on the diary but feet petrified. She stood at the window all night long as a motionless statue but her mind was raging. There were tornadoes, volcanoes, whirlpools swirling, erupting and devastating her from within. She wanted to cry, shout, scream but it seemed as if something caged her at this moment. Panic attacks aren’t new to Sally, her emotionally vulnerable nature have always put her on the receiving end.

Hours passed and it was dawn. Henry woke up around 6 AM and was terrified for a moment to see a motionless and emotionless Sally standing at the window staring at him without battling an eyelid. It seemed as if she is possessed.

“Are you Ok honey?” Henry quizzed as he got from the bed to get a hold of Sally. But before he could touch her she collapsed. Her body couldn’t take more.

“Sally!!” Screamed Henry catching her. He lifted her to the bed, placed her body comfortably. Meanwhile Tracy entered their room as she heard Henry screaming.

“I heard you screaming, what happened? What happened to Sally?” Tracy asked as she looked at unconscious Sally.

“I don’t know, when I woke up I found her standing at the window, looking pale and ghostly. When I tried to reach her she collapsed” explained Henry.

Tracy without furthering the discussion or showing any concern asked Henry if he would be going to office today or shall she start without him.

Henry gave a stern look to Tracy but cordially replied “gonna take a leave today, can’t leave Sally in this condition. And to think otherwise is a stupidity to say the least”.

To that reply Tracy walks up to Sally, settles beside her and gently carassess her hair and says “yeah, she will need a lot of that care now (emphasising on the last two words). Ok I shall take your leave now” and she left the room and Henry returned to Sally. As he was attending Sally, Tracy turned her head once more to get a glimpse of them over her shoulder. She had a smirk on her face.

Around 2 PM Sally woke up, struggled to get up straight as her head was in immense pain and felt dizzy. Henry at once dashed to her to help her. But even in such misery she was cold to the concern that Henry showed. He noticed that at once.

“Look I explained myself yesterday itself that how Tracy ended up at dinner with my client. To accept it or scrutinize my words is your call. I can handle your unwelcoming, cold, suspicious behavior towards me. That’s not my concern, people do change. This is surely not you, I mean not the one I know or have known. My worry is what or who is changing you” and he left Sally to ponder over his words as he got busy arranging lunch for her.

Resting her head on the pillow she turned to her left with Henry’s words now echoing in her head. She thought “he is not completely wrong. Women around Henry isn’t a new sight to me but I have never found it awkward or untoward or say never looked at it in that perspective where I could doubt his loyalty towards me. He gave his explanation, then why I am not able to process it. Am I really getting influenced, is there anything that is taking a toll on my common sense and understanding of circumstances”. She was immersed in her thoughts while looking at the diary as Henry entered the bedroom with lunch. She was so lost in her thoughts that “adventures and miseries” of Anne Turner couldn’t magnetize Sally to pick and turn to read the next turn of events in her life.

Sally and Henry had lunch in utter silence. As Henry got up to take back the lunch set up to the kitchen a sorry escaped Sally’s lips. That was nothing more than a whisper but did reach Henry’s notice. He simply smiled and nodes and turned towards the door to leave.

But before leaving he once again paused at the threshold “by the way honey I forgot to tell you a guy called Josh called when you were asleep”.

This made Sally a bit uncomfortable as she never disclosed about Josh to Henry, though she has been in touch with him for quite a some time now. “Oh Josh! Wh..what he was saying? She enquired in an inquisitive yet shaky tone.

“He asked you to call once you are awake, nothing in particular. Call him” Henry gestured to give a call and left. He left Sally in a guilt ride by not asking Who, Where, What…….

Change The Way You See Me


woman-nature

Dear Society,

You see me as tears, saga of a broken beaten self. But I am a rain drop that has many rainbows hidden in its embrace.

You see me as dust that can be swept under the carpet of your fallacious ego. But I am the earth from whose lap life emanates.

You see me as a heap of leaves that lie shuddering and withered on ground, awaiting for the spring to arrive. But I am the wind that drape seasons and facilitate change.

You see me just as glitter and bling of a shimmery costume that you can discard at will. But I am the fire that holds warmth, brilliance and blaze.

You see me as a fragile bird that you can keep shackled in the cage of restrictions. But I am the sky of dreams and aspirations beyond your comprehension and petty gaze.

You see me as “Just & After All” Woman, a petite body. But I am an embodiment of love, force and strength – the nature itself, an identity here to stay.

Change the way you see me is all I have to say.

From a woman proud of womanhood ❤️❤️.

MAKE SOME SPACE FOR LOVE


Candles Online

Set the alarm for the next day, have put the kids to sleep, hand cream ✔️, moisturizer ✔️, time to hit the sack and before calling it a day one important ritual to perform. Praying ❎, Reading a book ❎, Writing diary ❎, it’s a ritual followed more religiously, relentlessly – social media surfing. Yes, this is my confession laced with a teaspoonful of embarrassment and gallons of regret. What is so embarrassing and regretful about surfing the social networking / media sites, the world is on it. Yes it is but somehow it is not being utilised the way it was intended to. I understand this is becoming quite a confused narration and preachy by miles. Let me make it more comprehensible, let me give you a detour of my state of mind few days back.

Scenario 1: I have a moderately right leaning ideology when it comes to…

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I Sense A Presence XI


“Not for once he cared to know the details of Josh. Is it trust or indifference? This man never fails to puzzle me” Sally kept thinking for a while as her eyes followed Henry before he vanished from her sight.

As he went away she picked up her phone and instantaneously called Josh.

“Hi Josh, Sally here. Henry told me about your call. Tell me” Sally stretched herself a bit as she started speaking to Josh.

“Are you ok or it is your normal regime to get up around this time” Josh had a pinch of sarcasm mixed with concern in his tone. “Actually saw you a bit worried yesterday so called to check upon you” Josh mentioned his reason to call her.

“Yeah I am fine, it’s just that couldn’t sleep last night, nothing to really worry about” Sally replied. After a brief chit chat she invited Josh to home on weekend since he is in the same city, to which he cordially agreed too but instead of a weekend a weekday was agreed upon.

As she ended the call Henry entered the room to check upon Sally. He found her to be in a clam state of mind. He sat beside her, held her hand compassionately and asked ” is there anything that is tormenting you?” looking deeply into her eyes. Sally sighed deeply “can you read my mind?” and silence ensued as they kept looking into each other’s eyes and Sally broke down in tears. Yet not a word said as Henry embraced her in his arms and let her drench him in her vulnerabilities and fears flowing through her eyes. This type of emotional breakdown was not new to him.

After a while she was tranquil and announced to Henry about Josh. Resting on his chest, fiddling her fingers with his “Honey, I have invited my friend Josh to our place for lunch. He was my senior in college and now in police department. He moved to this city recently. Though I wanted him to be here on weekend but due to the nature of his work he decided to come over on Thursday. He will join us for lunch, so I would love you to be around that day.

Henry heard her and drew back his arm that was resting around her on her shoulder. Sally noticed this gesture, yet was waiting for his response looking at him. “Honey I would love to welcome him but Thursday would be a tough call for me. Anyways, you guys carry on, I shall meet him some other day. Since he is in the same city we shall meet more often” Henry replied but his usual warmth was a bit amiss. But Sally didn’t mind that. She didn’t want to overthink especially after that insane night she had.

*****************

Thursday (around 12:30 PM) :

Josh arrived with white carnations, Sally’s favourite flowers. “You still remember!!!” Exclaimed Sally as she warmly welcomed Josh into her house. She apologized for the absence of Henry on this lunch. “Sorry Josh, how I wish you could meet Henry, my husband today. But his work kept him engaged..” and before she could conclude Josh picked up “and the other day it was you, give the poor chap space lady” and winked. This is the Josh she knew over the years – witty and sarcastic.

They had lunch and walked down the memory lane for a while. And then the conversations returned to the present. “How long it has been in this part of the city?” Josh casually asked. “Been here for a couple of months now. Father’s demise made it difficult for me to stay in our old house. I was losing myself. So Henry proposed to move out, so here we are. But this house seems to have some character. Do you know that I discovered a patch on the kitchen wall that resembled to face of a woman, it scared me to no ends before it was painted” Sally shared her experience and offered tour of the house to Josh.

“It’s beautiful” quipped Josh, looking at every nook and corner he was shown. He was soon taken to the basement and to the very room where Sally found the diary. “Woah!! This house as surely seem to have a character or two looking at this basement or this is your preparation for the Halloween?” Josh cracked a joke looking at the basement that had a bizarre vibe to it.

Both had a good laugh about it. It was 5:30 in the evening when Josh received an emergency notice to report at the station. He left hurriedly. But came back in about an hour as he forgot his wallet at Sally’s place.

This time both Henry and Tracy were present and were formally introduced by Sally. The instant reaction of Josh while shaking hands with Tracy was that of déja vu “I strongly feel that this is not our first meeting”. To this Tracy rolled her eyes and smiled sheepishly. She was a beautiful woman after all and such remarks not new to her. Sally was a bit surprised at this behavior of her friend though but she dismissed further pondering.

Josh left.

**************

Around 11:00PM Sally’s phone vibrated. It was Josh. “I have a news for you. This is about Tracy. I was not wrong. I have met her before. She isn’t Tracy Tucker but Lizzy – a small time drug peddler” Josh broke the news.

“WHAT” Sally in shock…..

I Sense A Presence IX


Josh didn’t ask anything further and Sally left.

Josh knew Sally for quite a sometime now. He has seen her sensitive side, he has seen how she could hesitate to empty her heart and needed persuasion to vocalise her emotions and thoughts. A tiff with one of her best friend over her boyfriend whom Sally thought wasn’t right for her , left Sally disarrayed for weeks. It took lot of insistence by her other friends that included Josh as well to pull her out of the shell she has drawn herself into. As their paths crossed each other after years that old image of Sally loomed large in front of Josh as the petite figure of Sally diminished.

“Hmm, she is unsettled again” he sighed and retreated to his office.

Sally drove back with her head and heart full of the convict she met at the police station. His demonic demeanor invaded her thoughts . Cold sweat trickled down her spine as she rushed through the empty roads surrounded by dense woods. She was driving at such a speed as if someone or something was chasing her on those desolate streets. As Sally was lost in her incoherent thoughts “THUD” something hit the speeding car so hard that for a moment it shook the car. The tyres made a screeching sound bringing the car to a halt and Sally got down to see what was it.

She could find nothing but a trail of blood running towards the woods. “Gosh Sally What have you done!” She exclaimed and held her forehead in disbelief. She wanted to check as she inched few steps further in the direction of the blood into the woods. But the very sight of blood, deserted road had made her put off her plans and run towards her haven – her home while she apologised for the unknown creature that she hurt in her thoughts.

As Sally reached home she got a call from Henry. “Darling have a dinner with client, will be late tonight” and he hung up.

Sally quickly retreated to her bedroom. She needed a strong distraction from the tornado of negative emotions and thoughts she was experiencing at that very moment. And her eyes showed her a way out, the diary was still lying there. She picked up and continued.

…. you chose to trade them with a charade. Charade of emotions being reciprocated.

“Interesting” Sally thought asshe turned pages and continued to read.. your attention short lived, affection faded and admiration died towards me. We are now strangers in the guise of a relationship.

Page turns ….. I saw you snuggling with that witch in those sheets that still has my imprint all over. Can anything else be more painful than to see your heart being torn apart by someone who dwells in there…..

Sally felt for the woman as she got a peek through through these ragged piece of papers. As she was sympathising with the stranger she was reading about she heard faint giggling sound of a woman. She went close to her window as she was sure that it was from outside.

She was metted with a sight of bewilderment. It was Tracy, in an inebriated state and that was not the case of concern for Sally. It was her closeness to Henry that made Sally’s heart pound faster. She is a beautiful woman after all!!

Henry helped Tracy reached her room as she giggled and blabbered throughout. As he turned back, was taken aback by Sally who stood behind him.

“Oh my God! You scared the hell out of me Sally!” exclaimed Henry, loosening his tie and making his way to the bedroom. “Is it? How? Have I caught you? By the way how was the dinner with client? Was Tracy a part of your job? I am all ears for all your answers” Sally was unprecedent in the way she behaved – taunting, sarcastic. She has seen Henry with many beautiful women before too, but never for once a speck of doubt even faintly crossed her mind. But today it was not the same. Something is playing with her mind. She has been given a different prism to look at the situations.

Henry did come up with his explanations as to how Tracy ended up in the scene but was received by a rather cold Sally.

It was around 10:30PM, Sally stood near her window staring at blissfully sleeping Henry. Her stares were blank, emotionless. After standing at the window for an unreasonably long time, an unsettled Sally looked pale, her emotionless reflection in the mirror was nothing less than spooky. As the stares crossed Henry and reached her side drawer the diary was there, enticing her to dig deeper…..

**Is the life of Anne Turner the new prism for Sally?**

I Sense A Presence VIII


As Sally drove to the police station she was quite restless. “Who it could be and why?” resonated all along in her mind. The flurry of emotions made her jump few red lights too, but was fortunate enough not to meet any untoward incident.

She was received by Josh Edward, police officer and Sally’s senior in the college. They used to represent their college in chess and were members of college’s debate society. They shared a good rapport. It was by chance that he was assigned this particular case. They were seeing each other after almost a decade and the reunion wasn’t cheerful at all considering the situation surrounding it.

“Hello Sally, how are you” Josh greeted her cordially extending his hand for a handshake. His gesture was met with a nervous smile that stayed just for a fraction of seconds. “I want to know” Sally said in a rather shaky voice, fixing her impatient gaze on Josh’s face.

“This way please” Josh guided Sally towards the interrogation cell. She saw a frail looking man there at the centre of the room that had just a table in the centre and two chairs on both sides of it. One was occupied by the man, who could be in his late 40s or early 50s, had salt and pepper hair & beard, lean build, hands were cuffed and was staring the ceiling & walls of the empty room. There wasn’t a slightest hint of nervousness or fear on his face that ought to be evident from a convict’s face. He was calm and static as a stone and cold as grave.

Sally observed him from behind a window and asked Josh “is he the one?” The fragile frame of the man had churned the wheels of confusion in Sally’s mind for her late father was a well built man.

“Investigation is running in full throttle. You mentioned in your statements of having seen a masked person running away. And he is a serial killer infamous for his signature Mask. The police has been on a lookout for him for 10 cases in and around the city, including your father’s…” Josh was still talking when Sally stormed into the interrogation room.

“Did you kill my father? Did you kill Mr.Pattinson? Answer me” Sally was mad with rage, as she banged her fist on the table. She thought her emotions can evoke a reaction from the convict. But she was wrong. He was still composed in a quirky manner.

Looking away from Sally, he said in a soft tone “I don’t remember names. I just love the sound of crackling bones, sight of gushing blood gives me an adrenaline rush, the wailing bodies are symphony to ears. I have only numbers – 1,2,3,4…”. He was chuckling as he counted. This enraged Sally even more. She opened her phone gallery and showed her father’s picture to him “I am sure this would ring your memory bells. Now tell me why you killed him” Sally boomed at him. He looked at the photo for a moment but before he could say anything Sally was taken out of the room by Josh citing the norms and regulations of the interrogation laws.

Sally was now impatient than ever, awaiting his answer, rather a confession.

As Josh entered the scene he asked the convict about Mr.Pattinson “you are the masked killer, isn’t it? Confess it”.

The convict took a deep breath and started laughing like a lunatic. The room was echoing with his cynical laughter. After few moments he stopped, catching his breath and said “someone used my signature to hide their identity. And when I say signature I mean my identity, would never hide it. This man was never my target. But yes other 1,2,3,4….” he whistled a rhythm. His unruffled calmness opposed to the raging tempers made his words sound menacing even in those secured doors. Josh left the room.

Came to Sally who was in the other room having a view of the interrogation cell. Before she could bombard him with her questions, he took his cigarette case and left for the smoking area. Sally followed him.

After few puffs, having calmed down his nerves he said “May be we are knocking a wrong door. If he could confess about killing his other victims, I see no reason him denying this. Something is missing. Someone might have used his trademark Mask modus operandi. I am sorry for unnecessarily troubling you Sally. Ufff” he sharply exhaled. Sally was calm now.

She just patted on his arm as if saying “its ok”. And she went silent. But her silence couldn’t camouflage her nervousness. “Is there anything you want to say Sally?” Enquired Josh.

“Nothing” Sally dismissed the question with a smile. “Since you are in the city now, how about dinner this weekend, my place? Sally thoughtfully diverted the intriguing glares of Josh. But Josh knew that something was bothering Sally.

“Hmm, thanks for the invite. I shall let you know soon. Would love to meet your better half” Josh obliged.

Before leaving though Sally made a strange request “Josh, I forgot to tell you, don’t tell Henry about this meeting”.

I Sense A Presence VII


Sense of being choked to death in her sleep left Sally perplexed. She reached out to the glass of water on her bedside and saw the diary she was reading before she dozed off. Her fingers danced in confusion for a while that whether she should pick up the diary and start from where she has left. After few moments of dilemma she pulled the drawer, put the diary back and picked up aspirin instead as the disturbed sleep left her with a severe headache.

Ward off bad dreams” grunted Sally, tossing in her bed. It was 4 AM, when she finally slept. Four and a half hours later she heard some footsteps pacing up and down the room. It was Henry getting ready for the office. Around 8:30 AM he kissed her forehead and lovingly “Honey have a great day, I am leaving for the office”. Both indulged in a sweet moment as Sally acknowledged him while still keeping her eyes closed. But the harmony of the moment broke as there was a knock on the door and a voice followed “I am getting late HONEY”. It was Tracy, clicked her tongue and immediately corrected herself “I am getting late Henry, may I come in?”.

Her rectification couldn’t though avoid an awkward moment for Henry and Sally, it was uncomfortable for Henry and a suspicious one for Sally. Clearing his throat Henry said “her office is one the way so …

“I get that” interrupted stern Sally freeing Henry from her embrace and permitted Tracy to enter. The question “what’s going on, I need an explanation” was all over Sally’s face. Henry hasted to leave to avoid further tensions. “While you take out the car from the garage I will have a quick word with your beautiful wife” Tracy prolonged her stay in their bedroom.

Good morning Sally. I am sorry for the last evening and now as well. See, I can be weird sometimes with people I consider as my own. Whenever this past thing erupts I fumble, I go crazy, I….” and she paused for a while as she settled on Sally’s bedside, very close to her staring straight into her eyes. “Look at those beautiful eyes, so dark and dreamy, resting place to rainbow clad dreams. I envy you my darling” Tracy had a certain amount of cynicism to her tone that can send shivers down the spine. Her words were not loud, just more than a whisper. They were like a whip of air catching someone from behind unaware on an absolute silent night – scary! They left Sally dumbfounded.

The moment froze for few seconds and the stillness of the room was broken by the car horn on the road. “Bye dear have a good day. Once again thank you and sorry for everything” Tracy left with a devilish smile leaving Sally at a junction of conundrum.

“Am I overthinking about this lady or there is truly something to ponder or dig into about her? Was the entire Honey-Henry episode just a fumble or there’s something more to it than what meets the eye?” Sally’s head was buzzing with these questions as she left the bed and went to freshen up.

In the mirror she saw herself and realised that her right arm is bruised, it turned blue. That sight brought the words from the book to her mind “bruises were my constant companions”. But she decided to brush everything under the carpet of coincidence. “Must be a sleep thing” she shrugged and yet decided to know more what’s there.

She settled again on her bed comfortably and laid her hands on the diary, now it started from the beginning. By this time thought of Tracy was put at the backburner.

The first page had a small photo of a lady with a disfigured face and at the bottom was mentioned the name “Miss Anne Turner”.

“Hello Lady” said Sally to herself and continued. Those pages to begin with were just like any other ordinary diary – an in and out account of miscellaneous and mundane activities, incidents of one’s life. Sally wasn’t much interested in the petty chores of Miss Turner and she decided to go random. And she was successful in finding the interesting spot. It read:

I loved you with my heart, my smiles, my tears, my soul. But you chose to trade them with a ……

Before Sally could finish the portion (pale letters were a tough read) her phone rang. It was Josh, her friend from the police department.

“Hi Sally, I have a news for you. Its regarding your father’s murder. Can you come over?” Asked Josh. And this left Sally at the very same spot she was months ago, battling….

IS CONSUMERISM A COMPLETELY FUTILE CONCEPT?


Candles Online

Demand and Supply run the dynamics of the modern-day world or simply put Economics. Modern-day politics, policies, relationships – be it at the micro or macro level are governed purely by economics. “Size of the market” influences the amount of leverage any nation gets. To influence consumers or say lure them to buy a product, widen the market share is an old practice. With the world becoming a global village, competition is cutthroat and marketing is a serious business. At the end of the day it is to make a consumer believe – BELIEVE US, BUY OUR PRODUCT, HAPPINESS GUARANTEED!! And this is called Consumerism, to make (attract) the consumers believe that their happiness quotient in life will be enhanced if they buy a certain product.

Is Consumerism Bad? From a purely economic point of view, it is not. The entire machinery of the economy runs and depends on aggregate…

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I Sense A Presence VI


Sally kept on her excavation to see what else this room hosts. There were more words engraved very minutely. They seemed to be cluster of bees, making it difficult for Sally to read. They were entangled mangle of letters. She could hardly phrase out – mad, free, go. That extra stress on her eyes made her shut down that exercise in the middle.

“Huh” grunted Sally as she shifted her focus to the rest of the room. In her quest she found a very dirty gown and wrapped in it a book, probably a diary. Pages have age written all over them, few were torn, writing was neat to begin with but slowly became more scribbled.

Sally took the diary upstairs and preserved reading for sometime later. In the evening Henry arrived with their guest – Tracy. Sally warmly welcomed her. Tracy was a 38 years old, beautiful looking woman. Standing 5 feet 5 inches tall, brown curly cascades of hair running till her waist, unmistakably enchanting honey glaze eyes and a figure that could make any woman envious and man go weak in knees. But Sally was looking beyond her physical appearance – a broken person from personal loss, just as herself.

“Sally thank you so much for having me” Tracy thanked Sally cordially, to which Sally smiled and said “most welcome” and they moved in. At the dinner table amidst the chit chat rounds Sally brought up the issue of Tracy’s mother.

“Tracy, by the way Henry told me about your loss. I can totally relate to your pain. May I know what happened to her and what about your father, where is he?” Sally’s eyes now fixed on Tracy waiting for her response.

Tracy went silent for a moment and after a pause she continued ” my mother meant the world to me. The loveliest person of my life had to suffer the most because of the love of her life, my father. Till her last breath she waited for him who abandoned her for another woman. That’s why I killed him”. That word engulfed the room in an eerie silence. Tracy’s eyes were stone cold, devilish anger veiled her beautiful face and the fish in the plate got butchered to shreds.

Henry coughed and Tracy came back to her senses. “What I meant was I wiped him out of my thoughts forever” and she gulped down a glass of water and excused herself to her room.

Sally was stunned to see Tracy’s behaviour but brushed it aside with a thought that emotions can be overwhelming and might make people say words that they didn’t mean literally. She only tried to understand her agony and pain. She apologized to Henry for having brought up this topic. She felt guilty. But Henry being Henry “Darling, don’t be, she can be extremely emotional sometimes. She will be fine, don’t worry, have your dinner”.

Sally went to the guest room in about five minutes to sort out the issue with Tracy. “Tracy I am sorry, I shouldn’t have spoken about your family at the dining table. I promise it shall never be repeated. Will catch up tomorrow, have a good sleep. Anything else you need don’t hesitate to ask me. My room is just over there” Sally pointed out towards her bedroom while apologising about the tense situation that arose few moments earlier. They hugged and Sally left.

Marching towards her room Sally turned to see Tracy once again. She could sense a steel cold vibe. “Oh Sally! give the poor soul time” she thought in her head and went to her room.

In the room she found Henry already hit the sack and in deep slumber. Sally lied down on her side of the bed, drew a drawer where she kept her new found diary. Turned some random pages. She could hardly read the paled out ink. With some tussle she could read ” I feel suffocated at nights as if someone gagging me to death. Bruises are now my new constant companions”. This gripped Sally but not before fatigue & sleep took over.

1:00 AM – Sally suddenly felt as if she is being strangulated. She wanted to move but couldn’t budge, felt chocked. In few moments She got up and sat straight gasping for breath , found none around. Was it just a dream or was someone here? Her thoughts set to tick…..