Shed the question – Why me?

Human being is the most complex creation of God.  Reason –  it can think.  And due to its ability to think human mind is a hub to numerous emotions.  Grief is one of them.

What is Grief?   Literally it is antonym of happiness but I define it as a mother of negative feelings such as jealousy, hatred, depression and many more.  Our grief for lack of something makes us jealous of a person who owns that particular thing.  It’s our grief about not receiving a certain favor from someone that cultivates hatred towards them.  Its our grief only that pushes us in depression.  Just as grey has fifty shades grief has thousands or may be more outcomes and they could be devastating for everyone especially the person in whom it has taken refuge.  It’s therefore very important to control it in time.  We shall never groom our grief.

But the most important question to be answered primarily in this context is what is the reason for one’s grief?  It is the “Expectations” we have from people and our actions.  It is our expectations that deny us the happiness in performing our duties.  We calculate results well ahead of even initiating the task and in case the result didn’t turn out as expected we slip into grief.  Lord Krishna himself said ” Do your duties, don’t worry about the result”.  Thus no expectations is the key to happiness and probably could lock away grief.

Along with expectations one should shed the question “Why me?”  Its our first reaction when something unexpected happens.  Death in family, illness, robbery, unemployment etc. One question that erupts “why me?”.  We have a feeling that suddenly we have been abandoned by God in this journey and we are lone rangers.  This context reminds me of a song that I heard when I was a kid:

Duniya mein kitna gam hai

Mera gam kitna kam hai.

It translates to: there’s so much sorrow in this world mine is nothing compared to that.

If we can remember this golden rule nothing, no amount of grief can bog us down.  It would give us strength to fight out all the odds that cross our path.

Final words:  Grief management doesn’t mean that grief should never knock doors of our heart.  Being sad only reiterates the fact that we are humans.  But never be grief-stricken.  Before cursing everything around just remember the aforesaid lines.

Kalpana.

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