TAKE A PAUSE AND RELAX

Candles Online

Hello Everyone,

Guess whose words are these:

Don’t lose life working for a living”

Can you?  Ok let me put a pause to this guessing game.  They are mine!  Sorry if it was in a bad taste but the words need thorough introspection. Let’s do it:

I start with myself: Last year August I went to doctor after suffering for almost six months with pain in the elbow.  After consultation and X-ray i found out that there was a serious swelling in the tendonitis due to excess work pressure accompanied by my neglect.  The treatment course continued for an equal period of six months before returning to normalcy. Though it was not terminal in nature to be discussed on this platform but the severe pain did make me cringe in the course of discharging my duties towards family.  Neglect was not worth.

This is exactly what most of…

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Parental Guidance – Be More Careful Parents

Hello Everyone,

As the title suggests this is specially for parents, to be specific parents of kids (age bracket, I leave this task for you😀)

Without beating around the bush I would like to know from parents themselves how do they decide which movie their kids should watch?  Isn’t it obvious – of course the film certification stating the suitable age group aids the decision.  I am sure everyone is aware of the different classifications.  Here parental guidance is clearly guided beforehand.

Basically parents can safeguard their kids against any kind of sleaze, blood, gore and anything which is not meant for the tender minds with certifications on display.

But it might come across as a shock that kids need monitoring against the seemingly safe content that they watch especially on YouTube (one of the most widely viewed, there can be other online sources too).  There can be no denial that kids of this generation are more or less net savvy thanks to their early exposure, knowingly or unknowingly to the gadgets and WiFi connections.  There can be numerous reasons accredited to this.  Our nuclear family set ups, less time spent with family, our own addiction and submission to internet (after all kids follow our footsteps ☺) and so on.

What’s the threat?   Recently I caught my two years old  daughter watching a video on YouTube which apparently had no adult content but the portrayal of characters in that video was just unacceptable.  It showed a family of four (two daughters aged around 8-15 years, a father and a mother), everyone with a pacifier in their mouths and doing pretty much nothing but destroying things.  Throwing bad tantrums along with objects was predominant in that video which was meant for viewership of toddlers.  That was pretty much in a bad taste.  I immediately switched it off.

One more example:  Recently I read that famous cartoon “Peppa Pig” is having a negative impact on the target audience, you know whom I refer to.  The central character is a loud, inconsiderate, spoiled child (a pig as the name suggests) with haute tempers.

Considering the tender minds kids have such kind of portrayals influence their behaviour in the long run if not checked in time.  It might sound bizarre but continuous viewing of such  negative characters train kids to exhibit traits that they watch.  They might turn aggressive, throwing tantrums at the drop of hat, indifferent towards their siblings and responsibilities as well.

The irony is the animations and videos designed specifically for young ones are falling short of the most important aspects that should be their highlights – subtlety and drive home a point.  Aspects such as Body shaming, violence, bullying are gradually having  sedimentation into the content meant for kids providing wrong illustrations altogether.  This is not only pitiable but an alarming situation.

Therefore as parents we should be vigilant enough to monitor the view list of our tiny tots.

Reason:. They watch, they learn, period.  This is the only reason why we are constantly careful about our behaviour, about the language we use in front of our kids, isn’t it?  We want to set right examples.  Then why not go that extra mile?

Think about it.

1, 2 – CHA CHA CHA, LET’S DANCE

Candles Online

Hello Everyone,

December 2006, party in the office and I was pretty excited because it was my first.  After feeling shy to open up, my feet succumbed to the beats of the music and I did hit the “Dance Floor”. Party was over, turn the page to the next day in office – people started recognising me for the first time and for a reason other than my work. “Is she the new girl from phase two who danced yesterday?”, “Is she the one who danced yesterday? – this is how they wanted to be sure, this is how people outside my team and block started to recognise me (I became pretty popular 😋). That was because of my “Dance” and I enjoyed every bit of that appreciation and popularity (me being a human have my own follies, appreciation do flatter me😉).

And this is not just one occasion in…

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WiFi or Wife – what’s/ who’s your pick Mr.Husband?

Note: Fiction but a virtual truth of many lives today.

Hello Everyone,

Summer vacations and kids at Grandma’s place, such a bliss!  Some shopping, spa time and some quality time with hubby dear – this was all playing in Supriya’s mind.  Daily chaos – kids, home, office to be taken care of and something which she regretted a lot was lack of time (more than obviously).  As a result of which someone else (better say something) entered into their lives and equations have changed forever.

Now it’s time for setting the equations right, thought Supriya.

It was Saturday, Supriya had a long day at salon – her much-needed break and makeover.  She looked fabulous.  She was really happy to see the outcome and hoping to get noticed (well women’s’ greatest confidence booster when a hefty amount is spent on wardrobe and salon is getting noticed 😀).

She reached home and the moment she stepped in her only expectation was to be complimented.  And she waited, waited and waited longer till she could hold it no more and broke the silence first.  “You didn’t even notice my new haircut.  Tell me how I look?” She asked excitedly but in a complaining tone.   To this her husband lifting his gaze from his I-pad looked at her and said “yeah you look good” in a tone which was nowhere equal to his wife’s excitement.  We women can accept brutal honesty even if it is negative but lukewarm responses do irritate us.  So was Supriya.  To add to her irritation her husband said “well your new haircut reminds me that there is a new collection of movies on Netflix, we must catch up” and again he was busy with his new companion leaving Supriya sulking.  She so wished to disconnect the WiFi so that she could get some attention but never mind data packages are there to spoil it entirely.

And days kept passing without an iota of change.

She needed her husband back who used to have a conversation with her like a pal and to this she took this extreme step and left a note:

“By the time you get up after your late night sittings with your gadget I would have left.  I am leaving for my new project work, will be back in 15 days.  Don’t try to call me as it’s a remote area with no phone or WiFi connectivity.  Enjoy your alone time, see you soon”.

With this she left no avenue of contact for him as well as left him wondering how to go about the daily chores beginning with a cup of coffee.  He was baffled as there was no prior intimation to him.

15 days passed and Supriya was back.  Her husband was happy to see her and enquired her well-being.  He said ” I am so happy to see you.  I missed you a lot. I was so worried about you.  I have realised how much you do for me” he continued and Supriya was in no mood to stop it as she was thinking “come on, let it your emotions flow.  Let me know how much you love me and missed me, I am enjoying it.  Waited for it so long”.

“But I must tell you this” her husband said and she was brought back to senses “what he is up to now” she thought. ” What is it?” she asked with a tinge of suspicion in her voice and a raised eyebrow.

“I know you love me very dearly but I must admit that you have made me completely dependent on you.  My life would have been in shackles had it not been Google and YouTube came to my rescue and you being away for so long.  I just wonder what I could have done without WiFi and internet.  From preparing a cup of coffee to taking care of laundry – it taught me everything.   I think you should take up more projects like that without worrying about me because WiFi is there when wife isn’t” he concluded with a laugh.

Obviously that doesn’t go down well with Supriya and she did play her next move when kids were back and can you guess what was it?

“Going abroad for two months as a part of official project.  I hope you can take care of kids as well along with home because you have WiFi, right?  See you soon” 😀😀😀.

Moral of the story: 

  • Never ever take wife for granted.
  • Remember wife is great, nothing or no one can replace her.
  • Think before you speak especially before your wife.

😂😂.

 

 

Struck By The Strom

Hello Everyone,

Struck by the Strom and a log in my eye,

I am blinded and oblivious to the world around.

My eyes are shut closely with darkness surrounding by leaps and bounds.

I am confined to a corner petrified by fear,

I fear movement lest I would stumble down.

But the Strom did die leaving behind a dreadful silence.

Screaming at me a voice from within “Till how long?”,

“Till how long you will hide from life when you don’t know when the death would arrive?”.

I was stubborn enough to not to answer,

But soon sun rays did knock my eyelids urging me to listen and care enough to answer and I had to.

I was struggling to open my eyes to let the light drive away the darkness of ignorance.

Log was gone but pain still reckoning, tears still rolling down leaving behind a burning trail.

But the struggle wasn’t futile for my eyes are seeking comfort in the light of enlightenment.

Strom did knock me down only to let the wind of new beginning blow.

Strom did break my branches only to let me sense the strength of my roots.

Strom did turn the dullness on with its grey hue only to let me understand the beauty of colours.

Storm did struck me down only to let me stand a new chance.

 

Have You Acted Like A Fool Of Late?

Hello Everyone,

Have you acted like a fool of late?  Or in your distant past?  Do you remember those acts and do you laugh at them?  Can you laugh at yourself?

Ability to laugh at oneself is a boon and an agreeable characteristic trait.  You laugh at your follies, others won’t have a chance to laugh at you.

I don’t want to be overtly preachy here, just wanted to share few incidents where I felt like a fool, nudged my head for a second then, thinking “Gosh! What I have done?

  • Tryst with French: It’s been over seven years here in Belgium but my French isn’t perfect yet.  But now I can manage many things using that language for communication.  But remembering how I used to fare initially still leaves me in splits.  Wrong punctuation can be fatal. Before every conversation with any stranger I used to say ” Je parle anglais” which in English says ” I speak English” but what I actually wanted to ask was ” Do you speak English?” Which should actually go like this in French : ” Vous parlez anglais?  So basically I replaced “you” with “I” and the expression was of a question mark instead of a full stop.  Which means my expression was like “Je parle anglais? As if asking myself if I can speak English.  Such a blunder I tell you.  But irony is no one corrected it as they took it in face value as a statement of my confirmation that I speak English 😁.
  • Too friendly/ overtly eager to help:  Two days back I had some work in our commune office.  As I was walking towards the office I saw a couple with their baby in a pram near the office.  I just passed them and within a second turned back and told them “you can take pram from the other door and can use lift instead of carrying it on the stairs” because I thought they didn’t knew that.  They gave me a blank look as at first place they had no intention of entering the town hall and at second place they were wondering who is this woman uttering nonsense (believe me they had that look😂).  Sometimes trying to play good Samaritan without being asked can make us stand like a fool.
  • Feeling too excited because of nationality:   When you are in a foreign land faces from your land, for that matter everything associated (even seemingly or remotely) with your mother land gives a sense of belonging.  For example I get excited seeing a “made in India” tag on any cloth or accessory here in Belgium, any restaurant serving Indian cuisine, even if any random name sounds or smells of indian-ness catches my attention ( can’t help it).  So it was in the year 2013 I guess, I was on tram back to home, saw few Indians on-board and in inexplicable excitement waved my hands at them as I know them.  How silly of me! There was no reaction from that end. Felt like a fool.  What at first place prompted me to do such an action still a question for me.  That was just one such incident and that’s not my general way of reacting to see fellow Indians (you got to trust me, I am perfectly sane😁)

These are few incidents from my life that I wanted to share with you all and have a good  laugh (you can join the party and I won’t mind that).  It happens with all of us – pushing doors which clearly says “pull”; tripping off on a perfectly plain surface while walking that too bare feet; slipping off embarrassing words at wrong time with no wrong intention whatsoever.

Crux of the issue is being able to laugh and amused by own silliness.  Our silliness is not a weakness in itself until taken too seriously lest it becomes a weapon for others to tease us.

 

 

I CONFESS – I AM MONEY MINDED

Candles Online

Hello Everyone,

Yesterday night I was struggling hard to add Google Adsense on my WordPress site.  Only aim was to monetize my blog site.  But I failed.  Actually possibility of  monetization of blog sites encouraged me to start blogging.  Or let’s say one of the reasons.  And I don’t shy away from admitting so.  I don’t mind if you call me money minded, I really won’t.  Because if desire to be financially independent or make an extra stream of income is being money minded then I am “IT”.   Not only this but I think of money in every possible situation.  For example I wait for months of sale to shop loads because they offer huge discounts, if electricity bills flare up that gives me sense of tension, an unwanted expense that could affect the monthly budget definitely puts me off.  Though I have a comfortable life but this is the way…

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A LETTER FROM A BROKEN FATHER

Note: Purely a work of fiction

Candles Online

Radhika, a 25-years-old marketing professional recently shifted to Delhi as a part of her career decision. She convinced her parents about  her safety and took the big plunge. She was happy about her new project, new house, excited about life in new city.

Delhi – city famous for its mouth watering street food, high street fashion and zest for life also have a shoddy picture when it comes to the safety of women and that made Radhika a bit apprehensive.

But that it didn’t stop her journey from beginning her journey.  She used to take bus daily to her work and back. On one such fine day she noticed a man (must be in fifties or early sixties)in the bus staring at her constantly. She turned her glare other way and ignored him. But not for long. She saw him again, again and again consecutively and every time she noticed…

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Oh Woman! Go And Liberate Yourself

IMG_20170628_164517

Hello Everyone,

I am not sure about how shall I begin this but I am pretty sure about what I want to say.  It’s about every wonderful woman around.  Now please men! don’t draw your inferences that this is another feminist post or male shamming post.  No it’s not.  It’s about three important “E”s that should be an integral part of any woman’s life.  They are:

  • Education
  • Earning
  • Evolving & Exploring

Educate yourself:  Don’t let anything or anyone come in your path where you are trending and striving to enrich and enhance your knowledge.  I remember clearly what did Michelle Obama once said  ” Had I concentrated on how I looked instead of aspiring big would you think it was possible for me to be the first lady of USA.  No guy is cute enough to distract you from your goal” (forgive me for discrepancies as I am not copying the text but reproducing what I read, I may be wrong in quoting but not summarising).  She exactly meant that no matter what, education should never take a back seat while rest of the things can wait.  So if you are a young girl, study hard before you party harder later in life 😋.  If you are a woman, well you can still educate yourself with new things in life and world.  Education shall never be narrowly defined by the degrees one receives but how enhanced it leaves the outlook.  Your education shall aim at making a better person out of you and definitely those certificates don’t harm either, do they?😉

Earn – Well this seems to be a tricky issue.  For many it is a matter of need where they share the responsibility of running a household or even shoulder the entire responsibility.  Question is what if that responsibility is being taken care of well by the male counterparts, would she  or does she have to stop earning?  I think “NO” unless her health / mental peace is at stake.  Even if she is not under the thumb of responsibilities she should work (not talking about chores, they anyways don’t leave us alone😀😉).  Because it’s not about the monthly salary but it’s about her aspirations, her independence, her dignity and more importantly about her happiness of being self-reliant.  Working for self and being self-reliant makes her less vulnerable to the uncertainties of life (you can have a different view-point).

Evolve & Explore:   Grab any opportunity that life throws at you to learn a new thing.  Driving, swimming, a new language, any form of art – be it the need of the hour or a self urge.  Evolving self helps not only to explore world (meet people, go places, know new things be it a practice or a myth or a fact) but explore a new dimension of ourselves and of course a sense of achievement at the end of the journey.  It’s imperative for our existence as a human.  So never stop evolving yourself and exploring.

A close look at the above mentioned aspects reflect the fact that they are like three strings of yarn woven tightly together making them inseparable. This is how it is:

  • Education helps one “Earn” knowledge and “Evolve” as a person having strong viewpoints.
  • Earning helps one to “Educate” with skills as well as about the world thus “Evolving” as a person with competence.

It’s just like a circle biting its own ends😁.

Important rules we all must remember:

  • Never fear your voice being unheard without letting it out.  Speak up!
  • The three important “E”s mentioned above, age is no bar – never.

So dear woman you are never too old to liberate yourself from perhaps your own idea of yourself – “I am just it”.  Go for it and be a happy woman you always wanted to be.

 

 

 

IS THE MOB JUSTICE JUSTIFIED?

Candles Online

Hello Everyone,

Recently I saw a news clipping which brought forth the news of a mentally ill woman lynched to death by village people on the basis of suspicion that she has kidnapped a child. I emphasize on the word “suspicion“.  There was no proof whatsoever.

This is not something out of the blue.  Such lynchings have become more or less a routine.  People get killed by the mob because of their eating preferences (read beef), their religious beliefs, their voice being voiced (example: a young auto driver killed because he asked two men not to urinate in public, Reference: Times of India news site).

Reason behind this brutality:  Being hurt!  Yes people get brutalised by people because the later set of crowd gets hurt, I mean  when their religious sentiment gets hurt they don the robe of anger;  when their ego gets hurt on being pointed…

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